Message on the side of Kleenex tissue pack:
Directions for Use: It is a violation of Federal law to use this product in a manner inconsistent with its labeling. Use only as a facial tissue.
(Honest. I'm not making that up.)
You can imagine the conversation on the way to the big house . . .
What are you in for, kid?
Uh, I had this tissue, see, and rather than blowing my nose with it . . .
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